Monday, May 27, 2013

Facing my giants......or how to handle anxiety or not...

I have anxiety issues.....I'm not proud of that fact, but it's the honest truth!

I had my pre op appointment Friday and it started off badly when the registrar told me my copay and then went downhill.  I could go on and on about why the health care system is b.r.o.k.e.n. but I will spare you my unkind thoughts and move right on to the nurses.

Nurse Ratched called me back first.....she's with anesthesiology.  Did anyone else call her Nurse Cratchet?  I always misunderstand names.



Anyway, she proceeded to ask me every single question that I had answered on the paperwork she had in front of her......but since I was scared to death of her a bit intimidated, I answered again, then explained to her my level of anxiety and informed her they might want to get my I.V. running with heavy drugs immediately when I walk in the door. She quite quickly put me in my place, all the while calling me ladybug, punkin and some other cute name that fails me at the moment.  

Next came Nurse Sweetness and Light who was ever so kind and suggested I memorize some scripture verses.  That's when I hung my head in shame and told her I know the verses and am a Christian and trust Him, but that He knew I was like this before the creation of the world!  She sweetly patted me on the arm and said she thought she would be in the surgery center that morning and would be sure to look for me.......code for avoid me like the plague!  I suggested that for the good of all concerned they let the Superhero be back with me as much as possible before and as soon as I'm awake.  

Fast forward to today (which is now yesterday) and after church the Superhero suggested we go to the beach to relax.  He packed the ice chest with everything we might possibly need and we headed off to a beach about 45 minutes from home.  

We had to travel through the air force base to get to the beach and passing by one stretch, there were signs every few feet that read ........

DANGER!  EXPLOSIVE DISPOSAL RANGE.  

We were talking about where the explosives might be disposed of in the woods there and I brought up the fact that there are hundreds of deer living on the base. We giggled at the thought of them randomly exploding as they stepped in the wrong places!  OK.....many of you won't find that humorous, but remember I was under a lot of stress and any laughter was good.  

We drove through a small town just past the base that has always been a sleepy little beach town.  Well.....no more!  Every possible parking place was being utilized and the beach was wall to wall people!  I was really shocked.  I guess I haven't been there in a few years.

We drove through and drove down to a stretch of beach called Cape San Blas.  We trekked down to the beach and set up our umbrellas and chairs.  The wind was blowing and it was cloudy and cool.  





We stayed until we were both cold and the yellow flies were buzzing around menacingly!  Then we took a ride and eventually drove back home.  Bless the Superhero's heart.......he's so thoughtful to try to help me relax when he knows I'm wound up like a coiled spring.  


We are so blessed to live in such a beautiful place and I'm so thankful!  

It's Monday night now and tomorrow's the day of my surgery.  I've got a great surgeon and here's hoping he rested and relaxed over the weekend.  


15 comments:

Chatty Crone said...

God is with you Nancy. Hold on to him. And hugs and prayers sent your way - sandie

Nonnie said...

Praying for your peace and your healing and for kind nurses to be with you tomorrow. I don't know what you are facing, but Sandie is right (and I know you know it and don't have to hold your head in shame), God is with you. Glad Superhero is with you, too. Hugs, Connie

Kathy ... aka Nana said...

Praying that you will have peace - and that your surgery will go well. {{hugs}}

Auntie Bliss said...

I was going to tell you to chill out...then I remembered how I always have to be pulled back out the MRI machine in a panic...it's awful...so, I understand after all!!!
I'm not remembering why you need surgery...but pray it is easy and painless as possible. Mr. Superhero is very, very thoughtful and a solid rock...I can tell from here!

Deb said...

Hope all goes well Nancy ...you are blessed to have a sweet hubby

UnicycleRose said...

WOW! You are so blessed to live where you do!Love the pictures. You have a very sweet Superhero! I love your new blog layout! You also look like you have kept the weight off! Good for you ;0)

Cheryl @ TFD said...

Nancy, I didn't see your post until just now, so I'm sure the surgery is over. I pray that it was a success and that you are resting nicely and will soon feel up to letting us know how you are!
I, too, get anxious even before I just go in for a checkup! I'm a Christian and know better, but I can' help but worry.
Take care! (((hugs)))

Debby@Just Breathe said...

Glad you got to get out and go to the beach. Sorry about the nurses. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. ((HUGS))

Sweet Tea said...

Gurl, I just read back through a bunch of your blogs to find out what sort of surgery you are having. I TOTALLY know the kind of fear you describe. Medical issues are my "weak spot" too. I will be anxiously watching for your post telling us you're on the mend. I still have my gall bladder, but have the fear that someday it will need to come out. What would we do if we didn't have our guys to hold our hand and walk us through this sort of thing. God knew we needed them, didn't he?! Rest up and get to feeling better!!

Jo-Anne Meadows said...

Sometimes I find the drive better the the place we are going to......I know what it is like to be on edge over surgery although for the most part I am ok with surgery have to have a little faith that they know what they are doing........not always easy though

debi said...

Praying all went well and look forward to hearing about it....I know I will enjoy the read :-)

Hugs friend!

Auntie Bliss said...

Hey! How did your surgery go??
I hope all is well now!!

I don't know what email you used for me...I canNOT get into the Blissitydoodah one EVER for some reason...
I use pcovington270@bellsouth.net
thanks :)
Also, I have asked Shabby Apple if you can choose your dress or if you have to take the one I chose...still waiting on reply.

Sweet Tea said...

Stopping by today (Thurs) to check on you. I sure hope you're doing ok and feeling stronger. Praying for you!

Tiny little reveries said...

I hope your surgery went well. I think every member of hospital staff needs to actually have some sort of procedure in the hospital they work in so that they have some real empathy and compassion. I think they would treat patients a lot different if they did.
Those are lovely pictures - I just love the beach. And yes, exploding deer is a little funny.

Memoirs of Me & Mine said...

Prayers!

www.memoirsofmeandmine.com