Yes, I'm taking this title from a song.....but truly, doesn't a baby always change everything? A baby takes you from being a selfish, all about me girl to being a responsible, gotta take care of a little person girl. I'm pretty sure the week before Paul was born was the last full night's sleep I have had.
This is the baby that changed everything for me....my baby. My first born.
Things were very different then....no holding or touching your baby. They stayed in an incubator in the nursery (no such thing as NICU). Right before I left the hospital, they let me gown up, including mask, and hold him for about 25 seconds. During that time, I remember gazing at him and saying your life will be so great because I love you so much! And love him I did!
After leaving the hospital, I got to come twice a day and stand outside the glass window and look at him. I'm serious.....just look. I didn't know he had two birthmarks until the day I got to bring him home. It seems incredible now, but like I said things were way different. He stayed in that incubator 28 days. When I brought him home he weighed 5 lbs. That was the magic number at that time. A baby couldn't leave the hospital until they weighed 5 lbs.
I remember the day the dr. called and said Today's the day! You can come get your baby! I rushed to tell my mil and fil and we all jumped in the car and away to the hospital we went. I worried his outfit would be too big because it was for a newborn and he was almost a month old. :) I was so silly and young. Of course it swallowed him!
I was 18 when Paul was born and his daddy was 20 and in the Army. We were anything but prepared to raise a child. Unfortunately, love is not enough and I forgot his manual at the hospital! There are so many disciplines a child needs to learn, and we hadn't grown up enough to have learned them all ourselves!
I've written about this many times, here , here, and here and there are more but that's enough!
My joy bubbles over today because Paul is becoming a different man! He was in a program called Drug Court because of drug charges, he took it seriously and turned his life in a different direction. He and his wife started attending church in addition to AA and NA. I no longer hear anger in my son's voice when I talk to him. I no longer hear him blame everyone but himself for his problems. Those two things are huge for Paul.
Paul called me yesterday to tell me he has been released from Drug Court and his charges have been dropped.
I'm proud of him for so many reasons, but this is a special gift to himself! To me, certainly, and to all who love him, but more to himself and I think over the coming months and years he will see more and more what a gift his life is and how productive he can be with God's help! It might be a slow process, doing things step by step, but oh, so worth the effort!
I am so grateful and thankful to my dear Lord for starting him down this new road and doing a new work in his life. I pray 1 Corinthians 10:13 for him......when you are tempted, God will provide a way to escape temptation.
I love you, son!
And I love this smile!
This Thanksgiving is extra special! And as I've often promised the Lord, I give HIM all the glory!